Go Team Go

Lately there has been quite a lot of talk and discussion surrounding the issue of group dynamics. This is an incredibly relevant topic, and one that we can observe being played out in our own small niche, as well as South Africa. Our group, as has been previously noted by others, is incredibly similar to the situation in South Africa, due to our incredible diversity and wide range of personalities. Inevitably, however, conflict will and has arisen in our small community, and there are multiple aspects of this issue that I think have not been addressed thus far.
First of all, it has come to my attention that molding and plying of personalities is necessary for any group to be able to function and operate cohesively. That is to say, that every member of our group has been required to shift a little bit of their normal operating behavior in order to be able to live and cope with everyone else in the group. For example, I have had to be a little more lax in how I wear my hijab around the house. Due to Jack being here, I can’t walk around the house freely as I normally would, so I have had to sacrifice this and also come up with new, clever and a little less modest ways to adhere to my religion and accommodate myself and everyone else. This is just one example, but I am sure if asked, other people would have similar stories.
While this is the case and we have had to shift certain attitudes and actions to accommodate others, one other very important thing must be observed, and that is the fact that nobody in this entire house will ever be willing to radically or dramatically shift the way that they act to accommodate any other member of the group. That is to say that people are going to do exactly what it is that they want to do, and for this reason, instead of brooding and resenting the fact that these people will not change their ways, we must find ways to cope their actions in a way that best suits us. Yes, we may find ourselves thoroughly annoyed, inconvenienced and upset over the actions of others, but ultimately the power lies within ourselves to be able to cope with these traits of other people which we cannot change. While it is difficult to admit, the power to accommodate ourselves and to get the most out of this trip, lies with taking responsibility for our own thoughts, rather than trying to change others.
Again, also along these lines, we cannot simply go about our lives as we normally would with no regard to anyone else. While, as Americans, we have been raised within a system of meritocracy and capitalism, it is incredibly selfish and borderline insensitive to simply refuse to concede any personal gain for the good of the whole community or group. While people have pieces of themselves on which they are not willing to compromise, we must realize and accept that there are preferences and activities or habits we must be willing to forego for the prosperity and successfulness of the group. Simply clinging to our selfishness will get us nowhere, essentially, as the whole group must be able to progress unhindered by personal issues and baggage.
These are just a few of the things I have been observing and considering lately, and it has brought me to a new place in understanding group dynamics, especially as they relate to this group and to South Africa. I have made a resolute decision to be willing and open to the idea of sacrificing my prospects of personal gain if it will help to further the aims, reach and general progress of the group. While the incentive to do this is low and a there remains an issue of free riding by other individuals, I still feel morally obligated to do as I have mentioned because it seems to be the absolute right thing to do. While the right thing is never easy to do, it is always the right decision. Even though this blog has been directed almost exclusively to our group, in the future and perhaps in another blog I would very much like to expound on this and relate it to the South African model.